PURPLE CELLO

 

LEARNING THE CELLO

Life was predictable.  I woke up.  I brushed my teeth.  I got dressed.  I read my scriptures.  I did a lot of housework – laundry was on Thursdays.  I taught piano lessons.  I read books and cross stitched.  I made dinner for my family, watched the news with my husband, and went to bed. 

Every day was the same. 

I was in a rut and the monotony began to wear on me.  I tried to obliviate the boredom by practicing the piano more and reading different kinds of books, but I knew I needed an unfamiliar challenge.

Enter, my husband. 

Scott is a fixer and he decided that the fix I needed was to fulfill my childhood dream of playing the cello.

A brand new bright purple cello soon arrived at my door.  Scott knows my personality requires something a bit showy.

I was elated, but I’ll admit that I was also completely scared.  I began playing the piano when I was five years old.  I have a music education degree, and I taught music in the public schools for over 10 years.  But the thought of tuning, learning, and playing a stringed instrument terrified me.  Part of the fear was that I would be a failure. I wasn’t sure I could learn a new skill at age 48.

Scott had my back again. 

He encouraged me to find a teacher and to just start.  I did.  And I fell in love! 

Learning a new skill as an adult definitely isn’t easy.  Here are three life lessons I’ve discovered as a 48-year-old beginner.

-          Identify what’s holding you back.

Does learning a new skill, make you excited? Eager? Curious? Anxious? Nervous? Stressed? Or all of the above?! 

I really liked the idea of picking up a cello and playing just like Stephen Sharp Nelson. But I knew what that would take.  I was afraid of sounding bad.  I was afraid of failing.  And I was afraid of making mistakes.

I’d forgotten that mistakes help us learn. 

According to Dr. Lisabeth Saunders Medlock, “Our mistakes and failures are gifts, gems, guideposts in our learning and growth as people.”  She says to simply “embrace failures, mistakes, screwups and shortcomings because they make us uniquely who we are.”

My fear was failure.  But, as I began, I realized that failure would be the lack of effort – not trying.

-          Allow time for yourself.

How often do you take time for yourself? 

Family, friends and responsibilities always take priority, pushing our own needs, wants and desires to the bottom of our to-do lists.  Maybe we need to change that?

With Scott’s encouragement, I’ve realized that my new creative outlet has helped me grow, become and was a vital part of my own self-care.

Author Brene Brown discovered in her research that loving ourselves more than we love others is the first and most critical step to seeking happiness and fulfillment.  When our needs are met and we feel good about ourselves, it’s easier to elevate the needs of other people in front of our own.  It’s easy to be givers when our cups are full.

Amazingly, when I spend 30 minutes practicing my purple cello I definitely have more energy for making dinner or cleaning my house because of the moments I’ve spent being creative.

-          Ditch the “perfectionist mentality.”

According to one study, 31% of us rank “the fear of not being perfect” as one of our biggest fears.  

Fearing perfectionism holds back many people from learning new things and achieving new goals.  The same study explains that our need to be perfect is becoming a more common hinderance – it is not a good thing.  Setting healthy goals is much more important than aiming for perfection.

A year after picking up my purple cello, I can now tune it by myself.  I still struggle hearing the pitches perfectly, but I feel a sense of accomplishment as I get a little closer each time. 

I’ll continue to focus on increasing my skills and letting go of the pressure that comes from the need to be perfect.

My husband knows me.

He knew I needed a big, purple, stringed instrument in my life.  And I’ve learned a lot in the process of working with my cello.  Playing the cello has helped me to overcome the fear of failure, take time for myself, and even ditch my perfectionist mentality.  I’ve loved every minute of it!  I am more passionate about music, instruments, and the excitement of playing and practicing every day.  Not everyone would choose the company of a big purple cello, but I encourage everyone to learn something new.  Life is thrilling! 

At least that’s the way I remember it.